The RIE approach to parenting may be summed up in one word: awareness. We see and recognise them as distinct individuals. We broaden our understanding by watching them, giving them the room they need to reveal themselves and their requirements.
The RIE approach to raising children also helps us develop a healthier sense of self-awareness. We learn to not assume things about our newborns based on their subtle cues, such as whether they're bored, weary, chilly, hungry, or just want to hold the toy they spotted across the room. We realise that a baby's complaining or fussing is not necessarily a call to prop them up in a sitting position, pick them up, rock them, or bounce them to sleep. Infants, like adults, experience a wide range of emotions, and with our help, they will find their own way to express and resolve them.
We mature into people capable of separating our own projections from our children's messages. Understanding how the routines we establish for our children (such bouncing them to sleep or keeping them upright) might eventually become their requirements helps us to be more sensitive to their needs. In contrast to natural demands, these are entirely man-made.
In a nutshell, the RIE approach to raising children encourages us to use our rational faculties alongside our natural ones, to stop and take a good look and listen before reacting.
When we realise via perceptive observation that our infants are capable human beings with their own desires, goals, and requirements, there's no going back. Then we could start to wonder why we were so incorrect about newborns for so long, just like psychologist Alison Gopnik, who is at the vanguard of an exciting new wave of infant brain research.
Experts, such as Magda Gerber, the creator of the RIE, saw it coming. Infants are born with remarkable learning capacities, unique gifts, deep thoughts, and feelings; this is what Gerber and her mentor, doctor Emmi Pikler, realised more than sixty years ago and what Gopnik's study is finally demonstrating. Years ago, Pikler and Gerber disregarded the idea of infants as "cute blobs," instead seeing them as complete human beings who need our attention.
The RIE (pronunciation: "rye") style of parenting was established by Magda Gerber, a Hungarian-born early childhood educator and former orphanage medical director, after she relocated to Los Angeles. She believed that parents learn as much, if not more, from their children as their children learn from them. One of the most frequently used slogans by activists is "what we teach is ourselves." She founded Resources for Infant Educarers in 1978 out of a firm belief that children will flourish under kinder, more nurturing care.
The resources for infant educators (RIE) parenting philosophy has been popularised by an infamous Vanity Fair story that mocked the adult-like way in which RIE newborns are handled, and by celebrities like Tobey Maguire, Penélope Cruz, and Felicity Huffman, all of whom have publicly endorsed the RIE approach.
RIE is very different from the other popular philosophies. Parenting techniques like as "helicopter," "tiger," and "attachment" all place an emphasis on parental direction and control. The parenting philosophy that comes closest to this is free-range parenting, in which parents let their kids do what they want so that they can grow up to be happy, successful people with strong identities. Whereas RIE advocates for minimal parental involvement and supervision, free-range parenting goes much further in this direction.
Looking for the perfect baby nursery cot? Look no further! My Baby Nursery has the ultimate list of best baby cots for you to choose from.
FAQs About Baby Nursery
A nursery class is a pre-school class attached to a school. They provide early education and childcare to children usually aged between three and five years. They are normally open from 9am until 3.30pm and you may be offered either a morning or afternoon session, they are closed during school holidays.
Activities may include playing in the sandpit, listening to stories, painting, drawing, building with construction blocks and making things with play dough, doing jigsaws and puzzles as well as singing songs. Your child will learn early literacy and maths skills and develop their social skills
Nurseries provide care and education for children from as young as six weeks to pre-school five year olds, however some only cater for children over two years. Full day care is offered normally from 8am until 6pm. Parents can choose to use days and hours within these core times to suit their needs.
A nursery is generally designated for the smallest bedroom in the house, as a baby requires very little space until at least walking age; the premise being that the room is used almost exclusively for sleep.
Most children starting their nursery schools are aged 2-3. All children belonging to this age category are independent with a curious attitude, so they have a growing interest in other children. They also understand how to use a spoon and fork, which means they are ready to start nursery school.
Pros of using the RIE method
Pros of the RIE approach to raising children are numerous. There's room for parents to take care of their own needs without feeling guilty, which is something else that's missing from other approaches. (May I get an amen?)
Sweeney adds, "[RIE] has helped me feel confident in boundaries I set for myself, such as my own personal requirements." Even if my [toddler-aged] daughter is in another room playing with stamps, [I use the bathroom] when I need to use the restroom.
Furthermore, RIE parenting alleviates the stress that parents experience from feeling like they need to constantly occupy their children. Parents are relieved of the burden of providing constant amusement for their young children by the widespread acceptance of the importance of independent play.
Permitting your youngster to develop at his or her own speed is another perk. Instead of controlling their activities, they have some input and might, as a result, feel empowered even at a very young age. They can also be given more freedom to pursue their own interests rather than being led at all times.
Of course, paying close attention to your newborn is beneficial. You can strengthen your connection and sense of closeness by simply watching and listening to them. And that's absolutely remarkable.
Methodology of Rapid Eye Movement (RIE)
The RIE parenting approach encourages the parent and child to relax and enjoy each other's company by emphasising a baby-centered perspective. Fundamental principles:
There’s No Need to Lose Your Mind Trying to Keep Baby Entertained.
You are there to observe, not to be the source of all enjoyment while he passively sits by, according to the principles of RIE parenting. "There's this notion that babies get bored," Lansbury explains. "But in truth, everything is too fresh new and exciting to them. If they're the ones determining what they're looking at [or playing with], they go for a long time." Proponents of RIE believe that even newborns as young as three months old can learn to "assist" by lifting their legs during diaper changes, and that this skill can be passed on to other children.
In Your Interactions With Infant, You Engage in Extensive Dialogue.
RIE parenting entails a lot of discussions—even delivering a play-by-play—"sportscasting" everything you do. So as you go step by step through a diaper change, you'll be telling baby what to expect. "The narrative of events, behaviours, feelings, wants and hopes (past, present and future) is the most valuable part of the RIE approach," says Fran Walfish, PsyD, a child, couple and family psychotherapist in private practise in Beverly Hills, California. Having regular conversations with one's children is something I think all parents should do.
You Let the Infant Cry It Out if That’s What She Has to Do to Process Her Emotions.
RIE parents don't rush to stop a crying baby. They don't do anything more than hold the infant and comfort them when they cry, as they've already made sure their needs are covered. Lansbury advises that "we ought to strive to stay in conversation with a child who is crying." "Usually, we panic, and then we overstimulate them by rocking and bouncing and dancing with them so that they stop crying." Parents who practise RIE believe that soothing a screaming infant too quickly sends the message that it is unacceptable for the infant to feel distress. If we "consider it as an emergency" every time we feel something, "then it is an emergency to fix it," Lansbury argues. "That's not a healthy set up for life."
You Establish a Fresh Route Towards Discipline
Put away your notions of time-outs and discipline. In the RIE approach of parenting, limits are established and consistently enforced. "This is a really tough attitude in discipline," Lansbury says. To paraphrase, "It's not about being cruel, but being extremely firm in your boundaries." This teaches the child that she must remain seated while eating, and that when she stands up, it is an indication that she is finished eating and that the food should be taken away. You're the leader in this connection, and you're showing your child by example how to behave. Lansbury says, "Children learn most by modeling—they acquire excellent manners, compassion, and empathy from us."
What Are the Risks and Benefits of Rie Parenting?
Walnut Creek, California doctor Lisa Asta, M.D., notes that there is no simple answer to the question of whether or not this parenting theory is applicable, as infants go through a number of developmental phases in the first year of life. Some principles of child development, however, remain constant, and they include the importance of physical contact, the setting of clear limits, and the establishment of consistent routines.
Human infants don't begin walking and exploring the world on their own two feet until several months after birth, in contrast to horses and cows. Infants are powerless till this point. They learn about the world through their parents, which means they are totally dependent on you. "We educate it by talking to them and making eye contact to indicate that we're there for them and present and love them," Asta says.
Newborn babies spend the first three months of their lives adapting to the outer world and its day-and-night cycle. Because their systems have not yet formed patterns for fundamental activities like feeding and sleeping, newborn babies have a rather erratic schedule, making them more susceptible to disruptions like jet lag than adults. Due to the lack of a distinct circadian rhythm, "parents could cycle through numerous things a baby requires and not find exactly what it is," she explains. Because infants are so helpless, they require reassurance that someone will respond to their cries throughout the first three months of life.
Most infants have found a more consistent routine by the time they are four months old. Babies only start to develop receptive language skills now, and they do so at varying rates. But now is when paediatricians typically advise parents to start explaining their activities to their infants. She explains that paediatricians often tell babies "We're going to eat food now" so that they may anticipate the next step in the process and prepare themselves. "Communicating with children is essential for parents. Babies want stable environments with a consistent routine."
Permission idea becomes more nuanced as infants age. At about nine months old, many infants experience separation anxiety, characterised by aversion to being near unfamiliar individuals. Asta suggests that when guests arrive, you keep the baby on your lap and ask them to engage in conversation with you before picking up the baby.
As the first year comes to a close, toddlers may become more negative or independent, making it more difficult to ask for permission. "An 11-month-old may be too preoccupied with playing to respond to the question "do you want a diaper change now?" A 12-month-old would make your life difficult if you asked, "Do you want me to put you in your crib?" "asserts Asta. "To keep toddlers safe and healthy, boundaries must be established. It's not that you shouldn't establish physical limits for your kid; in fact, it's a terrific thing. The motivation behind what she's advocating is admirable. Issues may arise only during certain phases of growth."
In order to establish what she calls a "win-win" situation with a toddler, Asta suggests refraining from asking the child yes or no questions. Instead, she suggests the "medical we" for infants. When you say things like, "We're going to put you in your car seat and go for a ride" or "We're going to brush your teeth," you're not necessarily asking your child for permission.
However, there are positive outcomes associated with instructing young people to value their own bodies and respect the boundaries set for them. Asta claims, "Everyone wants to have boundaries." When children are more settled in their environments, they may be more able to share and refrain from roughhousing with others, even if those around them are still at the biting and kicking stage.
My Baby Nursery has the best baby nursery products to help create your dream baby room.
Consequences of RIE Parenting
However, not everyone thinks the RIE method is the best way to raise children.
Infants raised in the RIE approach are typically viewed as capable individuals from the moment they enter the world. Some have argued that this contradicts the concept of the "fourth trimester," during which children supposedly long for the safety and comfort of their mothers' wombs.
Some people think that Gerber's views, especially on the subject of crying, are out of date. Some argue that infants can learn to self-soothe by being soothed by carers, despite Gerber's belief to the contrary.
The RIE has also been criticised for appearing to be too rigors in its approach to issues like play. Gerber advocated for babies to be left on their backs during active playtime. Babies vary greatly in their preferences, so although some might thrive in this position, others might be more content switching things up.
Consider the Benefits and Drawbacks of Rie.
Pros
The RIE approach to parenting places less emphasis on setting boundaries. In contrast, other approaches to raising children put a premium on doing things a certain way. If you don't strictly adhere to these principles, you may feel stigmatised by society. Some of these alternatives include bottle-feeding rather than breastfeeding and separating the baby from the parents at night rather than co-sleeping. However, the RIE technique has fewer strict parameters. A perception, not a set of laws, is what Lansbury refers to. "There is no 'you are doing it properly,' or 'you are not doing it right.'" Whatever method you and the baby find most effective is the right one.
Less feelings of failure as a parent will be coming your way. Let's be honest: many of today's approaches to raising a child put the demands of the baby ahead of your own. That means a lot of parents and dads feel bad when they take time away to meet their own needs—even if it's to eat in peace or to use the bathroom. Moms are encouraged to treat their parenting as a partnership and prioritise self-care in accordance with the RIE philosophy. According to Lansbury, "you have boundaries right from the beginning in the relationship you have with infant." You have the right to look after yourself, and Baby has the right to express their emotions. If your child starts crying because you have to take a shower, it's best not to rush and instead tell her, "I hear that you're sad about it, but I need a shower."
You stress the importance of your youngster understanding and accepting his feelings. By not always attempting to make things okay for your child, the RIE concept encourages him to take responsibility for his emotions. Because it normalises and promotes the free expression of emotions, which we all experience, "many psychologists consider this preventative medication for mental health," Lansbury explains.
It's possible you could find discounted tools and playthings. If you're serious about RIE parenting, your baby registry list won't be long. Those who advocate the RIE approach to parenting rarely use baby toys like bouncers, swings, and other forms of baby equipment that could cause overstimulation. Additionally, you won't need to spend a lot of money on flashy toys; in fact, the simpler the toy, the better. "I found RIE when my baby was 18 months old, so by that time I had introduced a pacifier and way too many toys," says Natalia Palda, a mother who blogs about RIE at The Current Essential. We intentionally got rid of the battery-operated, one-use type of toys and only maintained the multiuse toys [like blocks and play dough] once I learned more about RIE and how all the different gadgets and toys weren't essential and, ultimately, hampered her intrinsic ability to play.
The independence of your kid will grow. You'll be encouraging your kid while giving her room to grow and learn on her own, which can make for a more assured, self-reliant kid in the long run. What Palda values most is that "autonomous play" has developed in her daughter. "I used to believe that I needed to always be stimulating my daughter's mind before I discovered RIE. In a secure context, I've found that letting my daughter choose her own play activities is the best way to get her to play without needing me to guide her or make decisions for her."
Cons
It seems like you're in for a challenging change. If the baby is used to you providing all the amusement and stimulation, he may need some time to learn how to discover his own methods to have fun—and that may involve putting up with a few extra tantrums or other types of acting out while you're applying the RIE approach.
It's possible you're feeling devalued in your capacity to parent and care for your family. RIE's emphasis on basic observation and connection may not feel like enough if you like having an active role as a teacher or guide in the baby's life. For example, "the parents who are wanting to develop the brightest baby," as Lansbury puts it, "it doesn't fit with those who want to be more active teachers for their children." For parents that practise RIE, it's more important to be in the moment with their child and validate her feelings, interests, and passions rather than imposing your own will on her.
There may be more tears. Parents that practise RIE ensure their child's basic requirements are satisfied before letting him or her cry it out without any intervention on the part of the parent. When something doesn't feel right, tears are a normal and healthy response, as Palda puts it. "Toddlers can't tell us how they really feel in words. Crying is their language." If you're the type of parent who can't handle seeing your child upset, you might want to look elsewhere.
Talking to the baby like a peer may feel strange. Even when caring for a newborn, RIE parents are encouraged to keep an open line of communication; this is not the time for mushy baby talk. As an example, you may say something like, "now we're putting your pyjamas on," to your baby as though you were interacting with a grownup.
Critics believe RIE is all talk, no action. Walfish argues that RIE's lack of action is its main flaw. The parents make all the right noises, but they don't actually make their kid follow the rules.
The tenets of RIE parenting offer hope for parents who want to build relationships with their children and learn more about them. The bond between Palda and her daughter is stronger than ever. "There is a lovely mutual understanding between us. This comprehension will surely grow stronger as she matures."
In Case You’re Curious About RIE Techniques,
Get in touch with your paediatrician and read up on baby and toddler development (Asta recommends the What to Expect the First Yearbook) if you're interested in implementing RIE parenting techniques with your little one. In addition to the paediatrician, Asta suggests consulting a child behaviourist.
Pay attention to the specifics of your own child and don't get fixated on a theory that may not pan out in actuality. "Successful parenting can be accomplished in a variety of ways, and children exhibit a wide range of personalities. For some kids, one method may work better than another "That's what Asta has to say.
It doesn't matter what kind of parent you are, there are some obvious cases in which your kid should not be making the decisions. "We would rather not invade a kid's personal space. Contrarily, you wouldn't dream of asking a toddler, "Can I hold your hand in a parking lot?" When it comes to your child's health or safety, you won't waste time asking for permission because children can't see the whole picture "Asta remarked.
The one thing we know for sure is that newborns need are your love and attention, despite the fact that there are numerous theories about how to raise your kids. Pediatricians are especially worried about parents who are too preoccupied with their phones to pay attention to their children. "Neither the science nor the existence of sufficient research to support these tactics is something I can attest to on my own. As a paediatrician, however, I can share what we do know, which is this: hug your kid, sing to them, and love them "declares Asta.
My Baby Nursery is your one-stop baby product store.
Conclusion
The RIE approach to raising children encourages us to use our rational faculties alongside our natural ones. We learn to not assume things about our newborns based on their subtle cues. Infants experience a wide range of emotions, and with our help, they will find their own way to express them. The resources for infant educators (RIE) parenting philosophy has been popularised by an infamous Vanity Fair story that mocked the adult-like way in which RIE newborns are handled. Parents relieved of the burden of providing constant amusement for their young children by acceptance of the importance of independent play.
The RIE parenting approach encourages the parent and child to relax and enjoy each other's company. Proponents of RIE believe that even newborns can learn to "assist" by lifting their legs during diaper changes, and that this skill can be passed on to other children. RIE parents don't rush to stop a crying baby. They don't do anything more than hold the infant and comfort them. Lansbury advises that "we ought to strive to stay in conversation with a child who is crying".
The RIE approach of parenting, limits are established and consistently enforced. Newborn babies have erratic schedule, making them more susceptible to disruptions like jet lag than adults. Infants require reassurance that someone will respond to their cries throughout the first three months of life. Babies only start to develop receptive language skills at around four months old. Infants raised in the RIE approach are typically viewed as capable individuals from the moment they enter the world.
Some argue that infants can learn to self-soothe by being soothed by carers, despite Gerber's belief otherwise. The RIE has also been criticised for appearing to be too rigors in its approach to issues like playtime. The RIE approach to parenting places less emphasis on setting boundaries. Moms are encouraged to treat their parenting as a partnership and prioritise self-care. By not always attempting to make things okay for your child, the RIE concept encourages him to take responsibility for his emotions.
If you're serious about RIE parenting, your baby registry list won't be long. The simpler the toy, the better. You'll be encouraging your kid while giving her room to grow and learn on her own. It can make for a more assured, self-reliant kid in the long run. Talking to the baby like a peer may feel strange.
When caring for a newborn, RIE parents are encouraged to keep an open line of communication. Critics believe RIE is all talk, no action. Walfish argues that RIE's lack of action is its main flaw. There are numerous theories about how to raise your kids. Pediatricians are worried about parents who are too preoccupied with their phones.
Hug your kid, sing to them, and love them declares Asta. My Baby Nursery is your one-stop baby product store.
Content Summary
- We see and recognise them as distinct individuals.
- The RIE approach to raising children also helps us develop a healthier sense of self-awareness.
- When we realise via perceptive observation that our infants are capable human beings with their own desires, goals, and requirements, there's no going back.
- The RIE (pronunciation: "rye") style of parenting was established by Magda Gerber, a Hungarian-born early childhood educator and former orphanage medical director, after she relocated to Los Angeles.
- The resources for infant educators (RIE) parenting philosophy has been popularised by an infamous Vanity Fair story that mocked the adult-like way in which RIE newborns are handled, and by celebrities like Tobey Maguire, Penélope Cruz, and Felicity Huffman, all of whom have publicly endorsed the RIE approach.
- The parenting philosophy that comes closest to this is free-range parenting, in which parents let their kids do what they want so that they can grow up to be happy, successful people with strong identities.
- Pros of using the RIE methodPros of the RIE approach to raising children are numerous.
- Methodology of Rapid Eye Movement (RIE)The RIE parenting approach encourages the parent and child to relax and enjoy each other's company by emphasising a baby-centered perspective.
- Proponents of RIE believe that even newborns as young as three months old can learn to "assist" by lifting their legs during diaper changes, and that this skill can be passed on to other children.
- RIE parents don't rush to stop a crying baby.
- Parents who practise RIE believe that soothing a screaming infant too quickly sends the message that it is unacceptable for the infant to feel distress.
- In the RIE approach of parenting, limits are established and consistently enforced. "
- Some principles of child development, however, remain constant, and they include the importance of physical contact, the setting of clear limits, and the establishment of consistent routines.
- Communicating with children is essential for parents.
- Babies want stable environments with a consistent routine.
- To keep toddlers safe and healthy, boundaries must be established.
- In order to establish what she calls a "win-win" situation with a toddler, Asta suggests refraining from asking the child yes or no questions.
- Instead, she suggests the "medical we" for infants.
- However, there are positive outcomes associated with instructing young people to value their own bodies and respect the boundaries set for them.
- Asta claims, "Everyone wants to have boundaries."
- Consequences of RIE ParentingHowever, not everyone thinks the RIE method is the best way to raise children.
- Consider the Benefits and Drawbacks of Rie.
- The RIE approach to parenting places less emphasis on setting boundaries.
- However, the RIE technique has fewer strict parameters.
- Moms are encouraged to treat their parenting as a partnership and prioritise self-care in accordance with the RIE philosophy.
- It's possible you could find discounted tools and playthings.
- If you're serious about RIE parenting, your baby registry list won't be long.
- Those who advocate the RIE approach to parenting rarely use baby toys like bouncers, swings, and other forms of baby equipment that could cause overstimulation.
- Additionally, you won't need to spend a lot of money on flashy toys; in fact, the simpler the toy, the better. "
- The independence of your kid will grow.
- You'll be encouraging your kid while giving her room to grow and learn on her own, which can make for a more assured, self-reliant kid in the long run.
- If the baby is used to you providing all the amusement and stimulation, he may need some time to learn how to discover his own methods to have fun—and that may involve putting up with a few extra tantrums or other types of acting out while you're applying the RIE approach.
- It's possible you're feeling devalued in your capacity to parent and care for your family.
- RIE's emphasis on basic observation and connection may not feel like enough if you like having an active role as a teacher or guide in the baby's life.
- Talking to the baby like a peer may feel strange.
- Critics believe RIE is all talk, no action.
- Pay attention to the specifics of your own child and don't get fixated on a theory that may not pan out in actuality. "
- Successful parenting can be accomplished in a variety of ways, and children exhibit a wide range of personalities.
- It doesn't matter what kind of parent you are, there are some obvious cases in which your kid should not be making the decisions. "
- We would rather not invade a kid's personal space.
- When it comes to your child's health or safety, you won't waste time asking for permission because children can't see the whole picture "Asta remarked.
- The one thing we know for sure is that newborns need are your love and attention, despite the fact that there are numerous theories about how to raise your kids.
